How To Sue
Your Mother-In-Law… And Prosecute
Your Kids: Ready-To-Use Legal Letters To Terrorize
AND THOUGHT-PROVOKING, How To Sue Your Mother-In-Law… And Prosecute Your
Kids: Ready-To-Use Legal Letters To Terrorize Your Family is written by
court officer Andrew Harley. The book carries this disclaimer: The Publishers
and author accept no responsibility if your entire family disowns you
as a result of reading this book. Just so you know what you're
From the publisher of the popular book The Timewaster Letters, How
To Sue Your Mother-In-Law is just the ticket for all wives whose husbands
maintain they don't know how to turn on the washing machine or refuse to finish
their DIY projects. It's also ideal for any husband whose wife can't serve up
decent food. And, of course, it is also for daughter-in-laws who want to protest
about their mother-in-law's anti-social behaviour on harrowing visits that have
led to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
This fun book is divided up into five chapters
including one entitled First Strike and another Retaliation each beginning
with an interest-ing black-and-white illustrative background. How To Sue
Your Mother-In-Law… And Prosecute Your Kids: Ready-To-Use Legal Letters To Terrorize
Your Family is an hilarious collection of spoof legal letters, forms and
contracts that cover all eventualities on the domestic front. Each chapter comes
with Guidance Notes ie, for Bank Reference for Fiancé it is "Ideal For
Avoiding Financial Meltdown" and indicates the sender is Female, the recipient
Male, the subject is Money and the category Collecting Intelligence. This will
help to ensure your intended is solvent before you tie the knot.
There are Cohabitation Agreements, documents to define sexual boundaries and
a Personal Hygiene Pledge Card that states: "I will wash daily, change my underpants
and use deodorant." Puh-leeeze!
Hollywood is awash with Pre-Nuptial Agreements and why shouldn't you hang on
to your hard-earned cash or get out of an unwanted relation-ship in the easiest
way possible? The book advises an Agreement that reads: "Upon the day that both
parties: a) run out of conversation, and b) resent each other's close proximity,
the relationship and marriage shall be pronounced… dead. Maybe it's just
that the Breeding Certificate doesn't cut the mustard...
This book will tell you how to return an unwanted item to a dating agency and
how to sort out the anti-social behaviour of all members
of the family and how to make sure your children's friends with behavioural
problems are banned from your premises!
Does your partner cook the food you crave? The Home Restaurant Satisfaction
Survey will sort out anyone who doesn't come up to scratch. And did your partner
miss your birthday or anniversary?
That's covered too, with a nicely-worded letter to the offender.
Ideal for asserting your rights, prosecuting your kids or suing your partner,
this book covers you from all sides. There is also a document for children who
wants to sue their parents and are demanding com-pensation for neglect (please
do not use crayon when filling in this form). After all, it could be that they
lacked basic parenting skills and in particular that they failed to "discover
prodigious talent in the claimant at an early age which would have ensured child
and a TV career", thus wasting their children's years and causing psychological
damage! As if!
Forget Jeremy Kyle or Tricia why air your dirty linen in public when
you can launder it in the privacy of your own home? Buy this book and if all
else fails, launch a nuclear strike…
How To Sue Your Mother-In-Law… And Prosecute
Your Kids: Ready-To-Use Legal Letters To Terrorize Your Family by Andrew
Harley, from Michael O'Mara Books, is out now and available from all good bookshops
at an RRP of £7.99. ISBN: 978-1-84317-231-4.